Apparently, you’re not supposed to masturbate in library bathrooms. Who knew?
“Masturbation Notice
Masturbation in the library toilet is a violation of University of St. Andrews Library Regulations
The recently refurbished toilet floors are not designed to handle your semen.
The excessive amount of semen stain on the floor cost thousands of pounds to be removed professionally and must be reflected in tuition fee rises for next year. It’s your money.
Please go home and masturbate if you are bored.”